Cracks in the Marble
by Onlymehere
Summary: Series of drabbles and one-shots. They can't fight Shredder all the time! Snapshots of the not-so-average lives of the Teenage Mutuant Ninja Turtles and their daily exploits.
1. Of Lectures and Lessons

**A/N: Well here goes nothing! Here's my first fic! Any and all criticism is welcome and appreciated! I'm going to be using this to post more one-shot/drabbles with this as they worm their way out of my head. :) Enjoy!**

**One more thing, I'd like to give a HUGE shout out to RedWritingRebel for helping me kick my butt in gear and finally start writing out what is running rampant in my head!**

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Donatello rolled his eyes for the millionth time and shifted impatiently between feet as Leonardo continued his boorish lecture. _ "God, I know how Raph feels. .._" he mused to himself.

"And furthermore, you should have better safety precautions in place in your lab. What if I had been seriously injured by the malfunction of your experiment? What were you thinking trying to build that inside!?What if…."

"Maybe if you didn't feel the need to shove your nose in everything in my lab like a two-year old we wouldn't be having this problem." Donny snapped, his anger flaring. He rubbed his temples in frustration; two months of work were down the drain thanks to Leonardo's sensory fixation that forced him to pick up and ask about EVERYTHING in the entire lab.

Leo paused, taken aback; he was unused to this sort of response from his purple banded brother. "Donatello!" He chided, "What is the matter with you?" He tilted his head slightly, a placating look encompassing his face.

Don seethed; Leo was even worse than Mikey sometimes. At least Mikey helped clean up and didn't blather about safety procedures for hours afterward. Grimacing, Donatello pointed to the door, "Just- just get out. Leave. I have enough to deal with as it is seeing as you've managed to blow up half my lab."Leo opened his mouth in protest but Donny silenced him with a scathing glare. "Out." He picked up a welding torch, "Or so help me I will shove this so far up your ass…"

Leo scurried out, determined to finish his lecture at a later time, far far away from any of Donatello's tools


	2. A Hairy Situation

**A/N: I realized on the last chapter I forgot to mention that these little green cretins are unfortunately not mine. :P I realize so far these have been silly but fear not the angst is coming! I'm going to try to post a new drabble at least twice a week, but no promises, sorry! :( As always criticism is welcome. :) And don't forget to stay awesome! - OMH**

**Also, these won't be in any sort of chronological order, so I'll try to put the setting for each up here in the notes. This one is set right after the turtles meet April.**

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"Hey ….uh, Ariel, right?"

It was the orange one again. Ever since she had met these odd terrapin creatures, the orange one seemed to be spying on her; sure he was friendly, but every time she turned around, there he was. He seemed fascinated with her in a way that none of the others were. The blue one, Lionel, no, Lenard, no, Leonardo, that was it. Leonardo was perfectly content to politely avoid her and focus solely on his ninja training. Donatello, the purple one, seemed almost afraid of her and rarely spoke; Don spent the majority of his time in his lab, his silence punctuated only by occasional explosions or breaking glass. She had yet to get to know the red one yet, because upon her arrival Raphael had done nothing but yell, curse, and break things before storming out, and he had yet to reappear during her visits to the Lair.

"April," she corrected, her mouth twisting in a wry smile, "like the month. You're… Michelangelo, right?"

Mikey grinned and vaulted the couch, plopping down heavily, "Yeah! So, uh, April," he furrowed his brow momentarily, "what's it like having hair?"

She paused, confused; what _was_ it like to have hair? She had always had it, what would it be like to not have it?

"It feels like hair I guess…"

He rolled his baby blue eyes and laughed, "That's REAL specific."

She blushed, "Well sorry! It's not like I go home and practice explaining the qualities of human hair to myself so that I know how to answer weird questions from large mutant turtles!"

Waving his hand dismissively, Mikey chattered on, "Oh come on! You've had it every day of your life! What's that like? I mean, doesn't it get all in your face and get on your nerves and stuff? Why don't you just cut it all off? Wouldn't being bald be a lot easier?"

"NO! It's not like that at all!" How could he even suggest that? No, scratch that, April had seen this one burp Nirvana's_ Smells Like Teen Spirit_; this should not have surprised her. She felt his eyes boring into her, demanding an answer via pure liquid cute.

She sighed, rolling her eyes and fighting a smile, "I guess it's kind of like your mask. You hardly ever take it off; it's part of you, even if it does get annoying. Right?"

"But I can take my mask off…" Mikey trailed off, his face brightening in anticipation "I'll be right back!" He reappeared several seconds later with a bright pink afro wig atop his head and a mask of matching color in his hand. "Here! You can wear this mask and I'll wear the wig and then it'll be like you're me and I'm you!"

April was overcome with hysterical laughter which made tying the neon pink band onto her face rather difficult. The fabric was scratchy, the eye holes did not fall where her eyes were, and she quickly realized that the mask was much more irritating than her hair had ever been, but Mikey and April's giggles could not be quelled as they continued to stare at the other's ridiculous appearance. The high pitched snickers soon roused even Master Splinter and Leonardo from their mediation and Don from the depths of his lab. Michelangelo opened his mouth to explain just as Raphael walked through the door to the Lair. Pausing, flabbergasted at the scene before him, Raph shook his head and let out a low chuckle.

"I don't even want to know."


	3. Of Love and Hate

**A/N: This one alludes to some darker themes and has quite a bit of swearing, so if it's not your thing, you may want to skip this one. BUT I'm actually really excited about this one! I put it together tonight in a few hours and it was definately my favorite to write so far :) let me know what you think! I'd love to hear from everyone (even guests) and get your opinions! Thanks for all the support! Stay Awesome!**

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The blinking red numbers of the clock seared through the darkness increasing in intensity with each passing minute, 3:23, 3:24, 3:25. Leonardo snarled to himself; Raphael should have been home hours ago. Why did Raph insist on doing this?They had not even argued tonight, no, but despite having gotten along all week, there was a tangible tension between the two. This was purely Raphael's usual nightly run; however his younger brother's absence still made him uneasy.

_'He hates you'_. The sick voice slithered into his ears once again. '_No!'_ Leo shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts and settle down to meditate once again. He closed his eyes, unsuccessfully attempting to expel all thoughts of his brother. Hours later he risked another glance at the clock; the numbers laughed at him: 3:25. Leonardo wanted to scream.

Raphael stumbled through the sewer tunnels, his swollen left ankle, nausea, and lightheadedness significantly slowing his pace. Knowing he had been out far too late, he expected a lecture from both Leonardo and Master Splinter in the morning regarding his excursion and prayed to all the beings in the sky that both of them were already in bed. What little patience he possessed was gone and his nerves frayed from the night's events; Raphael was in no mood to deal with anything but a warm shower and his hammock. To his dismay his brother was up and waiting for him as he staggered through the lair's entrance.

Leo, exhausted and irritated, rounded upon his brother the instant he set foot inside, "Raphael! Where in God's name have you been?"

"Ya know where I've been. Patrol." The hot head snapped. He forced himself not to limp as he made his way toward the stairs.

The oldest glowered; his red banded brother knew vague answers irritated him to no end. "Well I expected you to be home at a reasonable hour! I don't like going to bed knowing you're still out there!"

Flaming amber eyes met steel blue ones. "Fuck off, Fearless, nobody forced ya t' stay up." Raph leaned heavily upon the banister, trying to keep his weight off his ankle.

Leo exploded. "What is wrong with you!? Is it such a crime that I care? You go out every night, come home injured half the time, if at all and when you do come home you refuse to talk to anyone! What the hell is really going on, Raph? Are we so insufferable that you can't stand to be a part of this family!?"

A haunted look consumed Raphael's eyes, his face contorted, and he laughed darkly, the hollow sound resonating throughout the lair. "Ya have no damn idea what I do out there for this city an' this family."

Leo's breath caught in his chest, his brother's reaction scared and paralyzed him.

Raph sneered, "Shut ya damn mouth, Leo, jus' shut the hell up. I've seen things that would break ya, _Fearless_" He turned his back to his elder brother, "I don't wanna EVER hear ya question what I do for this family."

Dumb, mute, and rooted to the floor, Leonardo merely watched his younger brother climb the stairs unsteadily, limp to the bathroom, and slam the door. The blue banded turtle sank to his knees. '_He hates you.'_


	4. Names and Games

**Sorry for such a long gap my friends! So much for twice a week :P This one is a good bit longer though, so hopefully it makes up for my absence. Another huge thank you to RedWritingRebel for helping me out with my writing :) As always, stay awesome.**

**Disclaimer: nope, no ownership of turtles or otherwise here**

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Splinter sighed again, how had he gotten himself into this? As if being mutated into a humanistic rat wasn't shocking enough, he had also suddenly acquired four mutated terrapin sons in a way that gave the phrase 'unplanned parenthood' a whole new meaning. He surveyed his sleeping sons, his mood sinking; he knew he had nothing to offer them, save a makeshift home in the sewers and a life of endless struggles. Yet, he knew the surface world would never accept them, nor would the turtles survive without his care, and though they had only been together a few days, Splinter already felt a bond with these four like he had felt with his beloved Master Yoshi.

A chilling draft pulled Splinter from his musings, and drove home the importance of his next task. The nights were getting colder, he must acquire more blankets soon or they would all freeze to death. Opening his eyes, he found one of his sons was already awake, and furthermore imitating him in every respect. The tot sat across from him, back straight, legs crossed, and eyes closed, apparently, meditating. Splinter smiled as he watched the small turtle shift slightly, attempting not to show his discomfort in the position.

"My son," Splinter twisted his nose guiltily; he still had not named his children.

The turtle's grey- blue eyes snapped open, fixing upon his father in awe.

The rat began speaking slowly, unsure of the level of understanding the turtle possessed, "I need to go and get blankets for our family," He paused, "but you MUST stay here and watch over your brothers. You cannot allow them to leave this area. Do you understand?"

The turtle nodded solemnly, "Yes, Masta' Splinta'." Then the tot puffed his chest out importantly, " I'll make sure dey aw safe!" Hopping up quickly, the turtle scurried over to where his brother's still slept and assumed a fighting position, an extremely unintimidating snarl crossing his pudgy face. Smirking at the display, Splinter nodded slightly in approval, grabbed his pack, and then disappeared down the nearest tunnel, determined to return within the hour.

Racing through the tunnels towards the nearest dump, Splinter was plagued with thoughts of harm befalling his young sons. However, he accepted the grim reality that leaving them behind actually provided more protection, as they would run no risk of being seen by humans. He quickened his pace, grimacing as he sloshed noisily through the disgusting water, and within minutes stood at the foot of a manhole cover. He hefted the heavy cover carefully and emerged from the sewers for the first time in days. Pausing momentarily he savored the open air and the soft breeze caressing his fur, while also enjoying the sweet scent of coming rain. Making a mental note to watch for flooding in their home, he then began gathering any available necessities.

True to his promise, Splinter returned on the hour. He had heard high voices echoing down the narrow tunnels long before he reached his makeshift home, and entered the lair to see two of his sons arguing and the other two watching, wide-eyed, from across the room.

"BOYS!" He roared, "What is the meaning of this?"

The two arguing turtles froze, shocked, unable to speak.

"You are brothers, you should not argue in such a way." Splinter chided, "Now what is this disagreement about?"

The blue eyed turtle pointed accusingly at his amber eyed companion, "He did it! He wanted to weave here an' you told me not to let anyone weave!"

"Is this true?" Splinter knelt, peering between his two younglings.

Blue spoke up again, "It is Mas'er Splinter! I told him not to go but he tried to go anyway and.. and .. and he said you wasn't comin' back so we had to. But I told him you said to stay here and then when I wouldn't let him he HIT me!"

Looking quizzically at his other son, Splinter waited for an explanation but received nothing but a piercing glare. The amber turtle did nothing but cross his arms and stare unflinchingly into his father's face.

Reaching out to touch the young terrapin's arm, the rat prompted gently, "My son?"

The turtle dropped his flaming gaze to the ground, grumbling, "Waited a bit 'n ya didn' come back. Figured ya didn' want us no more."

Hurt and shocked, Splinter reached out to his four children. They ran into his arms.

Embracing them tightly, he whispered to them, "I would never abandon you. You are my sons and we are a family."

Releasing the four, he swung his pack from his back and placed it on the ground. "Now, I have returned with supplies for our family and some things for each of you." He produced five colored blankets from the bag, one brown, one blue, one red, one orange, and one purple and handed one to each of the turtles, keeping the brown one for himself. "These are your blankets, now. However, I do expect you to share with each other, especially as it gets colder."

The four nodded eagerly.

"I also have several toys for you as well, but, like the blankets, you must share them."

"Yes father!" They chorused, reaching eagerly for the bag.

Splinter smiled at the boy's beaming faces, extracted a book he had retrieved for himself, and settled comfortably in a corner where he could read and still observe his children.

The four turtles contentedly played together over the next few hours as their father leafed through a book dedicated to artists of renaissance. Sometime later, Splinter closed the book and called the four to him.

"Boys, I have decided on names for you. Would you like to hear them?"

The turtles looked at him in awe, names had never occurred to them.

Turning to the terrapin on his right Splinter looked deeply into his son's slate blue eyes and stated simply, "Leonardo."

Splinter reached his next son, repeating as he did for his first. He peered into the turtle's hazel-brown eyes. "Donatello."

Continuing with his ritual, he then turned to his amber eyed child. "Raphael."

Lastly, he reached his other blue eyed son; however, this one also had freckles. "Michelangelo."

The four turtles turned to face each other, each rolling his new name across his tongue. Raphael then abruptly poked Leonardo's head and giggled, "Tag, Leo! You're it!"

With that, the four brothers catapulted around their home, leaping over the toys strewn across the floor and over their father as well in an effort to escape the others. Splinter closed his eyes contentedly and listened to the joyful sounds of his children enjoying themselves. He nodded to himself. Tomorrow they would begin training.


	5. That Which Cannot Be Unseen

**Disclaimer: Blah, blah, blah, I don't own these green mutants**

**Warning: Gore!**

**A/N: Thanks for all the suport guys; I really appreciate it! This one is a bit dark, I'm trying give different genres a shot, so bear with me. Just an FYI:readers beware I have some ideas for some more adult content ect. but I will put a warning at the tops of those chapters so that if its not your cup of tea, you can skip those. BubblyShell22 asked if this was the 2k3 or 2k12 series, and while I tend to think more in the 2k3 (or the CGI movie) it could really be whichever you prefer ^.^ Also, if you have any suggestions for future drabbles please let me know, and as always, reviews and criticism is much appreciated! Stay awesome! -OMH**

**Another Note: I had posted this chapter before, but wasn't completely satisfied. Sooooooo.. I took it down and completely rewrote it! Here's the new and improved version. (I believe it was previously chapter 3). **

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Raph's POV

If there's one thing in this world that pisses me off more than my insufferably perfect brother, it's Purple Dragons.

I'd been watching these posers for about an hour; watching them pace up and down the dark alleyway like they owned the place. Joke's on you; these are _my_ rooftops, _my_ streets, _my_ city. Touch just one innocent. Try me.

A pulsating beat sliced through the dead silence as a scantily clad and obviously drunk blonde stumbled out the door of a local nightclub, giggling. "Oh- Em-Gee! Baby! Oh you know I will so call you!" She blew kisses back inside before stumbling along the sidewalk. I rolled my eyes and rubbed my temples, not another one. Will these whores ever learn?

The dragons had noticed her too, grins widening as their prey came clumsily closer, painfully oblivious to any danger.

Blood pulsed in my ears. My muscles shook. Turn around. Turn around damnit!

A hand shot out of the darkness, covering her mouth and a tattooed arm grasped her tangled hair and pulled her into the alley. Shock registered belatedly on her face. The arm slammed her into the wall. Her head cracked sickeningly against the brick. She moaned. He pushed his body against hers. His hands tearing at her clothes. The others stood behind him, jeering.

I'd seen enough. It made me sick. I dropped into the alley.

"I'll teach ya not to touch what ain't yours." I sneared, advancing.

Three dragons turned to face me. The leader, holding the blond, merely turned his head. "Take care of this… _Freak_."

My fist connected with the jaw of the first punk. I felt it break under my knuckles, a savage grin crossing my face. He jerked back, hand flying to his face from reflex. I followed with a snap kick to his chest, his ribs shattering as his sweaty broken body slammed into stone.

Too easy.

I whirled toward the leader; I had to get him away from that girl. These other two could wait. I flipped over the two goon's heads, landing in a crouch slightly left of their rapist-leader. I swept my leg right, knocking the goon to the ground. His head slammed into the concrete where he remained, unmoving. The girl, shaken but mostly unharmed, ran screaming from the alley.

Good riddance.

I felt the other two rush me from behind. I drew my sais and spun to block their attack. Not fast enough. I cursed as I felt the cold steel of a knife slide under my skin, blood streaming from the jagged cut."Stupid." I muttered, ripping the knife from my flesh. I flung it across the alleyway. I launched myself toward the nearer of the two; the miscreant froze. He stood motionless, mouth agape as I slammed him to the ground, my weight crushing his skull. I jerked my head up to find the last dragon; a feral growl climbing from my throat. He was gone.

Pussy.

I rose. As I strode past the leader his hand shot out and grasped my ankle.

"…help…. me…please…." he wheezed.

Rage consumed me. I hated these shit-faced lowlifes. I hated them for their crimes, hated them for those they hurt, hated them for existing. They showed no mercy. How dare he ask for it from me.

I roared. Reaching down, I grasped the leader by his neck and slammed him into the wall repeatedly.

"YOU WANT HELP? HUH? YOU WANT ME TO HELP YOU? DID YOU HELP THAT GIRL? DID YOU GIVE HER ANY HELP? DID YOU? YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"

He opened his mouth to respond. He never got the chance.

I slammed my sais though his chest. Over and over. He screamed. It stained the concrete, the walls, the entire world was cloaked in crimson. He shuddered and stilled. His blood mixing with my blood and sweat coated me in the metallic odor of death. It assaulted my lungs; I gasped for breath. Dropping his limp form, I reeled back. Bile inched up from my stomach; I dropped to all fours and vomited on the concrete.

I slowly pushed myself up, my muscles racked with tremors, a cold sweat coated my skin. One thought consumed me. Run. Run and never look back. I shakily made my way back onto the rooftops. I stopped again, and risked another look back. I wish I hadn't.


	6. The Straw that Broke the Turtle's Back

**Disclaimer: Not mine, sorry!**

**A/N: Thanks so much for your support on this story guys! Your reviews and criticisms make my day and are a definite motivator for me to write more. I love to know not only what you love but also what you hate about my fics. I'm also starting to enjoy writing them in 1st person. What do you prefer? 1st or 3rd Person?**

***Some of you may feel that Donny is a little OOC in this one; but it is definitely on purpose. I have a hard time believing that Leo and Raph's arguments don't get to Don and Mikey in some way, and I definitely don't believe Don is always as mild-mannered as he seems. **

****I promise to write more happy ones too! :) Sorry to those of you that don't like all my angst. :P **

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Donny's POV:

Yet another argument between my two brothers, as if we all haven't seen and heard this entire spiel a thousand times over. I reached for my coffee cup and wandered toward the lab door. Nursing the caffeinated beverage, I lounged in the doorway, observing my two warring brethren in aggravation.

"I'm trying to do what's best for this family! Why don't you understand that?! I'm the leader; you are my responsibility. Why can't you just accept that?!" Leonardo stepped forward aggressively.

Raph crossed his arms, "Oh yeah Fearless? Ya know what I think? I think you're fulla shit! News flash! You ain't perfect! So quit actin' like ya better than the rest of us!"

"I'm not!" Leo rolled his eyes and threw his hands up in exasperation, "I have to protect this family, Raph! Master Splinter gave _me_ that responsibility!"

"Protect them?! Half the time your orders almost get them killed!" Raph's voice rose with each word, "If it wasn't for me, Donny and Mikey'd both be dead already! And it _would_ be your fault!"

I felt something inside me snap. My blood boiled; adrenaline flooded my veins. A mist flooded my senses, obscuring my actions. I vaguely felt my arm draw back and launch my coffee cup across the room; it collided with Leonardo's shell, exploding, tiny glass shards piercing through both the argument and his skin.

Utter silence descended upon the lair; all eyes fixed upon me. I screamed; a feral sound, tearing its way from my throat, releasing with it every ounce of anger, worry, irritation, fear, and pain I had held within for so long.

"BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE HELL UP! MICHELANGELO AND I ARE NOT YOUR FUCKING PROPERTY FOR YOU TO _PROTECT_! "

My eyes narrowed, fixing my blue and red banded siblings in my gaze; their eyes growing in shock.

"YOU BOTH ACT LIKE WE ARE INCAPABLE OF DOING THE MOST MENIAL TASKS! I AM A TRAINED NINJA! I CAN PROTECT MYSELF DAMNNIT! I AM NOT AN INVALID!"

I dropped my voice, imitating the tones of my brothers, "'_Donny fix my motorcycle'; 'Donny, I broke the toaster again'; ' The T.V. is broken. Donny fix it!'; 'Donny do this, Donny do that, Donny work faster, fix more, be better!'_ "

I paused, my chest heaving and fists clenched.

"I. Am. Not. Your. Bitch."

Both Leonardo and Raphael flinched as if I had physically hit them.

"Funny how I'm always your best friend when you need something, but otherwise I'm a useless liability to both of you. Isn't it?"

I paused. I received no response.

"That's what I thought." I whispered bitterly, turning my back.

The iron curtain of silence descended once again, suffocating all but me; for I was accustomed to silence. However this time, I, the forgotten brother, the overlooked brother, the unneeded, useless, and unheard brother, had broken the silence.


	7. Waiting

**Disclaimer: I don't own diddly squat**

**Ugh, sorry, again, for so long between updates. :P Life keeps getting all up in my kool-aid and before I know it it has been almost two weeks between updates! :( Sorry, also, for this being a short one; Leonardo is not my forte. I'm doing my best to keep a good balance and not focus only on my favorite characters; I created a poll on my profile concerning characters in my writing so if you'd pop over and vote I'd really appreciate it! As always, reviews are much appreciated.**

**Stay Awesome!**

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The candles burned low in the night, covering me in their dying light. The thin wisps reached for me out of the darkness, clinging to every pore of my skin, tendrils filling my consciousness with nothing but smoke and flame, cleansing all within me, removing all worries, fears, and feeling from me.

My blissful, numb meditation was broken by my brother's excited whisperings from within the next room. I sighed, the lead weight dropping back upon my chest; I knew they were planning something. It would be dangerous no doubt, but it was just as surely to be incomparably fun, but as their leader, I had to be the responsible one, the levelheaded one, the "anti-fun" brother. Not only would I not be invited, but I would be actively avoided.

The whispers ebbed like a tide, rising excitedly and breaking only when one of the three would shush the others for fear of alerting me or Master Splinter. Raphael, the de facto leader of any mischief, especially top side mischief, was the most audible; his deep rumble easily piercing the paper thin walls.

I could hear the grin on Raph's face as he laid out the plan. "C'mon! It'll be a breeze. Fearless'll never even know we were gone."

"Ohhhh, we are SO gonna be in trouble if he finds out!" Mikey barely repressed a giggle and was promptly smacked.

Don, his typically low drawl rising, chided, "WELL, we won't have to worry about him finding out if you could keep your freaking voice down!"

A collective, "SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" and more giggling followed.

Sometime later, a slight creak of the door and fading whispers were my only signal that they were going out.

As I struggled to hear the last of their retreating footfalls, I found myself hoping, praying that they would stop by my room on the way out and ask me, just once, to come with them. Holding my breath, I waited in vain to hear my door open and for one of them to drag me along with them, citing some bullshit reason that meant I had to come along. I waited for them to see me as a brother and not a nuisance. None did.

The tiny flame of hope within me died silently. I closed my eyes, bowed my head, raw anguish racking my frame. I shook violently, trying desperately to contain the scream building inside me as unbidden tears streamed down my face.

That night and many others have since passed. Seasons have passed; we have aged many moons.

I am still waiting.


	8. A Mikey Morning

**Disclaimer: Not mine :'(**

**A/N: Here's another chapter! I don't feel like its quite my best work but its what I've got for now! :p I'm trying for a peek into Mikey's brain by doing an internal monologue type thing. I hope it turned out alright! Enjoy and please let me know. Stay Awesome! - OMH**

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4:45a.m.

"It's a bird! It's a plane! It's-"

"MICHAELANGELO!" I squealed, interrupting my alarm clock's chime. Jumping from my bed, I stopped momentarily to strike a Superman pose before dashing to the bathroom. We had dojo training all day and this morning I wanted first dibs on the bathroom because there was no way I was getting stuck with it after Raph had been in there. We'd had burritos for dinner last night.

I flexed at myself in the mirror while brushing my teeth; damn I'm fine. I don't understand why I'm not covered in women by now; except that I'm green, live in a sewer, am a turtle, and the toothpaste drool isn't helping me out either… well…. Maybe I understand….

Sometimes I wonder why we have to do so much training, too. I mean I'm not saying that I'm the absolute best fighter out there, but I know a thing or two about kicking serious shell. I mean I AM the BATTLE NEXUS CHAPMION!

"Mikey! Stop hogging' the freaking bathroom you parasitic microbe!"

"Good morning Professor Grumpasaurus!"I sang to my elder brother.

"Shut up and get out Mikey, you've been in there for like thirty minutes." Donny sounded really tired so I decided not to antagonize him too much. Besides, I broke my N64 again and need him to fix it, and that involves me being nice to him.

A half-asleep Donatello grumbled a thank you and stumbled past me into the bathroom as I pushed the door open. I hopped down the stairs to make breakfast, and more coffee for Don 'cause I really need my baby fixed. After a few minutes Raph slouched in, mask askew, and proceeded to skewer my breakfast bacon with his sai. The smell of bacon is one of the few things that will rouse him from his hangover-comas.

"HEY! That's my bacon! And you didn't even ask if you could have any!"

Raph could not have stuffed more bacon in his mouth if he had tried. He managed to mutter "Wha'er" at me through the mass of MY breakfast in his mouth.

"Wha time'sit?" Raph's a real morning person. It's all we can do to get his fat ass out of bed by noon most days.

"5:45, you lazy prick. Quit eating all my food!"

He thanked me for my help by throwing his plate at my head. Aren't brothers wonderful?

Leonardo nonchalantly caught the plate a fraction of a second before it shattered against the wall, and greeted us with with a neutral, "Good morning. Let us convene in the dojo and begin training." Leo's always super formal for training; it's like he goes back to the middle ages or something.

I kneeled and dramatically pleaded with Raph, "Come hither o brethren of mine! We shall go forth into the dojo and slayeth the Dragon! Hehehe!"

Raph muttered obscenities and hauled himself toward the dojo with heavy footsteps and I bounced along behind him. Raph and I kneeled in our usual places on the training mats and waited for Leo, Don, and Master Splinter. I wasn't surprised to hear snoring from Raph soon after; he is SO gonna get it from Master Splinter!

Splinter, Leo, and Don filed in at 6:00 sharp. We're supposed to be learning a new kata I think.

"Raphael! There is no sleeping during my training sessions! 20 flips!"

Ohhhhhhhh! Go Splinter, go Splinter, it's your birthday!  
Raph's in trouble and its only 6a.m. Today is gonna be so awesome!


	9. Just In Case

**A/N: Ugh, I'm sorry, once again, for the long time between posts. Midterms and school in general has kept me pretty busy. On the plus side I had a random blast of inspiration and have begun working on a chapter story! I plan (fingers crossed) to have the first chapter up within a week! This drabble is a little bit of brotherly fluff with a darker twinge to it. I hope you enjoy. As always you guys are my motivation and I love nothing more than to hear from you guys! Let me know what you think! **

**-OMH :)**

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What do you do when you can't sleep? What do you do when every action, every deed, every word you've ever uttered keeps you up at night? The pain burns deep within my chest, making me feel as if I had swallowed a hot coal that is now slowly burning through my entire body. Alone, I crouch in my room, drenched in sweat, trembling like a child futilely trying to expel these terrifying images from my brain. Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, broken, before my eyes begging for my help, pleading that I save them. But I can't. I can't because I'm not good enough. I can't protect them. Nausea overtakes me and I push myself up and drag myself to the bathroom; I desperately need water. At the sink, my ghastly reflection stops me; virtually all color has drained from my skin, bags hang, heavy, under my bloodshot eyes. Repressing a shudder, I fill a cup with water, gulping it down, I feel the individual droplets trace trails of fire down my throat. Utter exhaustion threatens to overtake me and I groan, leaning more heavily on the basin, and stick my head down under the running water.

I feel a hand on my shoulder, "Raph?"

Startled, I jump away from the sink. "Yeah?"

Don looked at me knowingly, "You having trouble sleeping?"

It wasn't really a question. He knew. Donny always knew. "Nah, not really." I managed a small half-smile half-grimace.

He stared intensely at me as if he could read every inch of my face, "I can give you something to help you sleep. It'll help with nightmares too."

"I'm straight bro, really. I'm ok." I shake my head

Don's eyes narrow, "Alright… Goodnight Raph." I listen to his retreating footfalls and soon hear the door to his room close softly.

Sweaty and still slightly nauseous, I decide to shower. I relax, letting the cool wash away my fears, dreams, and thoughts. It wipes away all; I let the water wash away all of me. Hours later I clamber slowly out of the tub and back toward my room. Climbing into my hammock, I turn to glance at the clock but instead a strip of paper near it catches my eye.

_Just in case you change your mind._

Next to it were two white pills.


	10. Understanding

**A/N: Here's a little brotherly fluff to balance out the angst filled earlier drabbles! Leo is probably my weakest in terms of writing; so I hope I got his character down alright. My first chapter of Shattered and Scarred (my first chapter fic) is up as well for those of you who'd like to read it. Thanks again for all your support! I have not once regretted beginning to post my work on here. :) -OMH**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything! (cries pathetically in the corner)**

Raphael hated the sewers. He hated the way the cold seeped into every pore of his skin, always boring its long fingers into every crevice of his body, chilling him to the bone. He hated the confines of the tunnels, damp, low-ceilinged, bug infested, and oppressively dark. He longed for the openness of the rooftops and the freedom it offered. Topside there was room to breathe, room to run, room to live. A warm summer's breeze lifted the sounds of the city to Raph's ears, covering him in the ceaseless hubbub only a city can produce. He sighed contentedly, rolling his shoulders to loosen the muscles and releasing with it all his troubles. Savoring the rarity of his contentment, Raph hummed softly to himself. Crouched on the edge of a high-rise, entranced by the shadows dancing in the dying light was his meditation. The sunlight and noise did for Raph what candles and silence did for Leo; it allowed him to let his thoughts wander.

"I see why you like it up here."

Raph tensed. How long had Leo been sitting next to him?

"It's almost peaceful in an odd sort of way," Leo continued cautiously. "That's why you come here to get away." The understood '_from me'_ hung in the air as a statement of fact. There was no emotion, no anger, fear, nor even awkwardness. Raph glanced at his brother. Leo's eyes were fixed upon him; however, there was no air of superiority exuding from the blue banded turtle. To the contrary, there was equality and willingness to understand in his eyes.

Raph raised an eye ridge, "Yeah, I guess so. It's open up here, not closed in. There's space to move." Cracking a smile he added, " Plus there's the added bonus of beatin' up thugs."

Leo laughed lightly, "That is definitely a bonus."

The two sat in silence, each waiting for the other to speak, neither willing to be the first. The sun slipped below the horizon, taking with it the patterns of pink, orange, and red previously embossed across the sky. The two sighed in unison; vibrant amber eyes pierced the darkness and were met by flaming blue orbs, and four words fell from the lips of both simultaneously.

"I don't hate you."


	11. Movie Night

**A/N: I have had an attack of my muse tonight! Here's another drabble that jumped up and bit me.**

**Disclaimer: Nope, still not mine.**

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Movie night at my place again! It's rare that I see the boys all together and cooperating somewhat, aside from when one of them is bleeding out or injured in an equally terrifying manner. They've turned up on my doorstep half dead and bleeding all over everything more times than I'd like to count; heaven forbid the police ever need search for the remnants of cleaned up bloodstains in my apartment. Ugh.

I have to leave them here alone for about fifteen minutes while I go get the pizza; please God let my apartment still be standing when I return...

To make sure that Mikey or Raph don't destroy anything while I'm gone, I called upon the responsible one, "Leo!"

He poked his head around the corner, wearing a rather suspicious grin, "Yes, April?"

"I'm going to get the pizza now. This building better be in the same condition as it is now when I get back or no pizza for any of you." I looked him dead in the eye and tried to be intimidating.

As it turns out trying to intimidate a sixteen year old trained ninjitsu warrior even with pizza doesn't work very well. He looked mockingly horrified, giggled and promised to try to keep an eye on the others. Great, that's _real_ comforting. He's going to 'try' to make sure they others don't burn my house and shop down.. again. Gee, thanks, Leo.

I pulled in my driveway after getting the pizza and it appeared, from the outside at least, that nothing was amiss. That could either be a great sign or a terrible one. Walking in the door I was immediately accosted by Mikey who claimed that he knew I was home because his "pizza senses were tingling."

Raph smacked him, "Oh come off it Mikey. We all heard the van pull in."

"Raphhhhhhhhh!" Mikey whined through a mouthful of pizza, "You coulda' let April think I had superhero powers for detecting pizza for a bit! Jeeze! You always ruin my fun!"

I snorted into my drink. This is the same kid that gets mad when we call him the baby of the family.

"So did you guys ever decide what movie we're going to watch? Or are we going to do it like last time and just argue over it all night and not actually watch anything?"

To my surprise they had all agreed already and we were going to be watching _Inglorious Bastards_. Why did I leave them alone to pick the movie? Now I get to watch Nazi's be scalped all night and endure various scalping references for the rest of the week. Boys. I use the term watch loosely, as more often than not, 'watching a movie' actually consists of Raph and Leo verbally sparring with various characters on screen, Don making scientific and historical connections to the events and excitedly telling us about them, and Mikey shushing them all because he can't hear the dialogue.

Leo and Raph are pretty funny to listen to when they watch movies because Raph does the usual, "Uh-uh! Don't go in there! You're gonna get killed if you do! Don't you freakin do it! See I told you. The dumb bitch." type comments and Leo compulsively yells the upcoming lines out before the actor can. Overall it would be awful to watch a new movie with them, but they definitely enhance the experience of rewatching a movie I've see a million times. Mikey just gets really agitated with everyone talking over the movie and usually gives up trying to actually watch about halfway through it and joins in the side conversations. I was sent on another snack run and came back to the most interesting conversation.

Mikey was yelling at Raph, obviously trying to provoke his brother into naming all the scars on his body,"Oh yeah! Well I bet you don't remember where you got all your scars, Raph! You've got way to many for that!"

It worked. "Could to!" Raph began proudly pointing at various marks on himself and listing the offending object and owner that had caused it. The others began jumping in, asking about scars on each other and pointing out their own. This was perhaps one of the weirdest macho contests between them I had ever witnessed.

Leo laughed pointed at one on the side of Raph's neck, "Oh yeah! That's one I gave you during a sparring session a few months ago!"

"Yeah, I remember." Raph grinned darkly before imitating Leo's lofty attitude, " Pay attention to your form Raph, you're getting sloppy! Raphael! Are you listening to me!?"

This prompted Raucous laughter from all of them.

I pointed to a small indention on my nose, "Yeah and this is from where Don punched me in the face when I tried to wake him up in his lab."

Don went beet red, letting out a very un-manly squeak. More laughter.

God, I love my screwy, dysfunctional, insane, teenage, mutant, ninja family.

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**A/N#2: I'm actually thinking of taking the part where they're discussing scars and turning it into a full scale fic where it would essentially explain the situations that caused some of their more notable scars. Opinions on that? Would you read it if I wrote it? Leave me a review and let me know! :)**


	12. Birthday Blues

**A/N: Here's a little fluff/angst combo for your enjoyment. This little plot bunny bit me on my birthday and I just had to put my views on birthdays into one of turtles. :) Bet you can't guess which one :P Hope you enjoy this little drabble!**

"Happy Birthday dear April! Happy Birthday to you!" My four turtle brothers, and Master Splinter sang boisterously to me. I laughed as Mikey strutted about the room bearing a quadruple layered cake in his large green hands, obviously proud of his baking prowess. Twenty-six candles flickered softly atop the cake, not that I could reach the top if I wanted too.

"Need to stand on my shoulders so you can blow out the candles, April?" Mikey asked grinning deviously as he set the massive cake in front of me.

"Nah! Because unless a male stripper is going to pop out at me, I'm not impressed" I shot back, matching his grin.

Master Splinter politely ignored my lewd comment but the boys howled with laughter; Mikey took that as a personal challenge and immediately began twerking on me, which makes cutting and distributing birthday cake quite difficult, actually. Donny got that look on his face like he was about to join in, but I refused to allow my birthday party to become a turtle twerk team practice.

I slapped the back of Mikey's head, "Michelangelo , if you don't stop assaulting me with your backside I swear I'm going to steal your entire comic book collection and burn it!"

He stopped immediately and gave me the most pathetic puppy dog eyes that have ever existed; I'm almost positive he broke the world record for most pathetic face then and there but he still sat down and practically inhaled his first of several cake slices. As we conversed over cake, it dawned on me that in all the time I had known the guys that, one, I had no idea how they knew their birthdays, and, two, I couldn't think of a single time that we had celebrated one for Raphael.

I didn't want to be rude, but the longer I thought about it, the more it bothered me. Finally I worked up the courage to ask, "So, how do you guys know when your birthdays are? Did you find documentation from the pet store from before you were mutated or something?"

The four of them looked up, surprise and an unidentifiable emotion falling across their faces.

"Master Splinter knows his; it's February 29th, the same as his Master Yoshi's. When we were little we always celebrated together, but once we were old enough, Master Splinter let us pick the day we wanted." Leo shrugged lightly. "I always wanted to be the oldest so I picked January 1st. Mikey picked December 26th because he wanted to be able to open presents two days in a row and Don picked August 12th so he could share his birthday with his favorite scientist."

"Erwin Schrodinger! He used a cat in a box to explain the quantum mechanics of infinite possible realities." Don's face glowed as he (somewhat) briefly explained the theory behind the cat experiment. I'm pretty sure I was the only one that understood a word of it since the others just nodded blankly throughout the lecture. Oh Donny, your genius astounds me. He finally trailed off, leaving a gaping hole in Leo's explanation. When was his hot headed brother's birthday?

"And Raph?" I looked inquisitively between the red and blue banded turtles.

Leo replied hesitantly, "Raph doesn't have a birthday."

I looked at Raph incredulously, and all I managed out was a less than intelligent, "What?"

Raph crossed his arms and looked around, refusing to meet my eyes. "I never wanted one. So I decided I wouldn't have one. I still don't understand what everyone gets so excited about. If you're a human, ya get to celebrate the day that your mother squeezed you out, covered in nasty shit an' screaming bloody murder. Congratu-freakin-lations." He rolled his eyes.

I wrinkled my nose at his less-than-poetic description, but, hey, that's Raph for you.

"An' if you happen to be a giant mutated turtle, you get to pick a day to remind yourself how you don't know when you were born-"

" hatched, Raph, we hatched" Donny cut in.

"Yeah, yeah, hatched, born, same thing." He continued his voice gaining a razor sharp edge of resentment. " The fact remains that it don't really matter that we exist an' you guys just pick a day an' call it ya' 'birthday' to make yourselves feel better!"

His words hung thick in the air, the isolation and anguish tangible in his voice. They were alone.

He closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead , " 'm sorry, April. I'm not tryin' to make your day bad. You should be enjoyin' your birthday!"

He looked up at me, and we locked eyes. His intense gaze was momentarily filled with pain, but it was quickly walled away behind his mask of confidence. Looking for a graceful way out, he stood, gathered the dirty dishes, and exited to the kitchen. I looked between the four remaining in my living room and shrugged. Master Splinter stood up and pulled me into a close hug.

"Happy birthday, Miss O'Neil!"

I smiled back. I was with my family, and that made it the best birthday I could wish for.


	13. Fears and Foes

**A/N: Here's an angsty little bugger that crawled its way out a few hours ago. To me, it seems like Master Splinter would feel very torn about the turmoil their family goes through, from both internal and external sources. So I decided to write some of what he would be feeling and thinking about his sons.**

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I sighed and set my now empty cup of tea down; 1a.m. and I was still no closer to an answer. I rubbed my eyes, wishing desperately I could force the tiredness from them, wishing I could clear the pounding in my head, and the aching in my muscles and bones. I have aged more than I care to admit, and soon, I fear, my sons must carry on without me. I pushed myself slowly up from my mat, grimacing as my joints popped loudly in protest, and began to amble about the lair, my mind and feet wandering aimlessly.

I found myself, sometime later, standing in the doorway to Leonardo's room. I gazed wistfully in at my eldest son's sleeping form. Only in the deepest of slumber did all signs of worry flee his face, allowing him few precious moments of bliss. He appeared peaceful and content, a look I had not seen upon his face for more than a decade. Life has been kind to none of us; however, Leonardo has shouldered a heavier burden than his brothers, taking upon himself the mantle of leadership. I slid my hand down the doorframe and turned away, sorrow welling up within me.

"Sensei, is everything alright?"

I looked up; bloodshot, deep brown eyes laced with concern and rimmed by a purple mask stared intently into my own.

"Yes, Donatello" I smiled softly, "I was merely restless."

He nodded, yawning. "Ok, goodnight Master Splinter." He shuffled slowly to his room, exhaustion evident in every movement. I watched his retreating form, moving only slightly down the hallway behind him.

Donatello. My genius son is practically nocturnal, preferring to continue his research late into the night with the assistance of coffee, much to my dismay, than to rest. His incredible intelligence has saved our family many times, and I am thankful to have been blessed with such a wonderful son. I have always worried for him, though, as the complexity of his thoughts is far above that of his brethren, and often leaves him feeling frustrated and unwanted. Looking down I shook my head; I rue my inability to provide for his intellectual needs.

I turned to my youngest's room. Michelangelo was sleeping soundly, his permanent grin still residing upon his face. His enduring happiness has been an irreplaceable beacon of hope for our family in times of despair and the mere thought of my son's antics brought a smile to my face. Empathetic and caring, Michelangelo has always possessed a unique emotional connection with his brothers, anchoring them in times of need, but, I wonder, how often they do the same for him.

Loud murmuring and scuffling movements roused me instantly from my musing. My ears flattened against my skull and my fur stood on end as I crept slowly down the hallway toward the disturbance.

Reaching Raphael's door, I realized the sounds were originating from deep within his room. I raced to him, fearing an intruder had infiltrated our lair, only to find him flailing about in his sleep, his guttural muttering crescendoing with each syllable.

I reached out, firmly taking hold of his shoulder. "Raphael! My son, what troubles you!?"

He flinched away from my touch as if I had burned him, his eyes opening suddenly. Chest heaving, he stared blankly up, eyes wide yet unseeing. Several minutes passed, his ragged breathing the only sound that pierced the darkness. His eyelids began to droop, and his breathing slowed after several minutes. I slumped against the wall, sleeplessness taking its toll.

My poor tortured son. Raphael. I have worried most about Raphael for some time now. I fear his inner demons are stronger than he believes. The pain pouring out through his amber eyes, begging for help, starkly contrasts his actions that push the world away. I buried my head in my hands. He would accept no help, insisting nothing was wrong, yet wake up in the dead of night shaking and helpless. And all I can do is wonder: what tortures you so, my son?

Blinking back tears, I managed to retire quietly to my room for a restless night. I have grown old; age has crept stealthily upon me, attacking swiftly and precisely. I fear for our family, for I can no longer heal their wounds as I once could, I can no longer provide all the answers, I can no longer anchor this family. And we have already begun to fall apart.


	14. A Different View

**A/N: Its been way too long since I updated this too :P Sorry about that guys! I've been sick and studying for finals. This drabble is a bit longer than most so I hope it makes up for my absence! As always, drop me a line and let me know how I did! I love feedback from my readers. :) I'm not sure if I've done a disclaimer lately either so...**

**Disclaimer: If I owned them, I would give it to someone more creative than me lol**

**ENJOY!**

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My six fingers flew frantically across the abused keyboard, searching for the final piece of the puzzle. Over the past several months I had dedicated my time to deciphering the mysteries of our mutant turtle genome, and I was now moments away from mapping the entirety of my family's genetic makeup. The last several letters of Michelangelo's DNA appeared on my screen: G-C, A-T, T-A, T-A, C-G, A-T. Smiling exuberantly, I pushed my chair back, spinning around until I was dizzy as I rolled victoriously around my lab table. Slowing my rolling chair to a stop, I rested momentarily considering the possibilities now that I had sequenced it all; I could begin to understand what our genes meant and possibly the secret to our mutation! However, copious amounts of coffee or not, there was no way I could do any more tonight; the adrenaline rush that had accompanied my discovery was fading, leaving me exhausted.

Pushing my lab door open, I found Leonardo pacing relentlessly in the living room.

"You're up late. Raph's still out?"

He looked up and nodded curtly.

I sighed; Leo always did insist on waiting up for Raph, even if it was sure to make the situation worse."Come on, at least sit down. Pacing isn't going to make him get here any faster."

I plopped down on the couch, and stared patiently at him until he sat down too, if for no other reason than to pacify me.

"You don't have to wait up. You can go to bed, you know that right?" He sounded dead, the words dropping from his lips like lead weights, rehearsed. He was tired of the same routine, tired of fighting.

"I know I don't." I answered, observing him critically. There was no way he had been sleeping much. "What if I want to?"

He looked at me in amazement, seemingly unable to believe that someone would actually choose to spend time with him.

My dark hazel eyes met his steel blue."Before you say anything, no I don't hate you, and no you're not a terrible leader. Despite what Raph says we all including him, love you and think you're a good brother and leader."

A sardonic smile passed his lips and he tilted his head, "If you say so, Don. I have a hard time believing Raph feels any of that." He looked away, and quietly added "sometimes I don't think he feels anything at all. Well, except anger, maybe."

I put my hand on his shoulder, turning him back towards me. "Leo, you don't honestly believe that Raph hates you… Do you?" I dreaded the answer. Had our family slipped so far apart and I had not noticed?

"I honestly don't know how he feels," he continued, anguish palpable in his voice, "and I'm almost afraid to find out. It's hard to feel that he doesn't hate me most of the time." voice wavering, he cleared his throat. "That's usually why I wait up for him. I want him to know I care. I know he doesn't take it that way, but I have to show him I care..."

I dropped my hand from his shoulder and grimaced. He had a point. Raph was never one to apologize or make up for things. Mikey and I were always ok with the unspoken and unacknowledged 'you're forgiven' from Raph, but Leo had always needed verbal reassurance, otherwise, he carried that burden forever.

"I just don't understand."

His quiet admission shocked me. It was rare that Leo did not understand things, and while I had known for years it was true, hearing him admit it so plainly was unexpected to say the least.

"I don't understand at all" he repeated, dropping his head into his hands.

I breathed deeply, choosing my words carefully, "I don't think any of us really understand each other, at least not as much as we like to think we do."

I paused, waiting for him to speak, waiting for a reaction of some kind. He gave none. I fidgeted nervously and continued.

"I think Raph feels this more than the rest of us and his stress reliever is more obvious, too. I don't think he goes out to annoy you; it's just the only thing that relieves stress for him. And he feels like you don't understand that."

Leo looked over at me incredulously. "But the rest of us don't feel the need to go gallivanting around topside risking our lives!" He threw his hands up in confusion.

"When I get stressed, I can go in my lab and work. Mikey can play video games or read comics, and you enjoy meditating and doing extra katas. Raphael hasn't found something like that to help him. Beating the shit out of things is what helps him." I shrugged. "I'm not saying it's the smartest thing to do, or that it doesn't hurt us sometimes but that's what he does. That's who he is but he feels that you think he isn't good enough and never will be."

Leo opened his mouth hesitantly, conflicting emotions, tempered with horrible understanding marring his face. Finding his voice, he whispered, "He thinks that?"

I swallowed hard, Leo wanted the truth, but it was going to hurt. "He thinks you hate him for who his is. He believes that you don't even see him as a brother because he doesn't meet your standards."

A strangled sob escaped my older brother and he covered his face, shaking. I reached for his hands, pulling them down from his face, and dragging him into an embrace. He clung to me, refusing to let go, and I hugged him back with equal force.

"I'm sorry, Don." He finally choked out, extracting himself from my arms.

I stood, "Stop. You have nothing to be sorry for. Come on, let's head to bed. We're both tired, and Raph will still be here in the morning."

He nodded, smiling weakly at me. "Thanks, Donny.."

"Come on, Fearless."I grinned, "Let's go. You can sleep in my room if you want."

He laughed, "Ok, just don't tell Mikey, because he'll be upset we didn't wake him to invite him."

"Oh, God, that would be whining of epic proportions." I shook my head.

To our surprise, Mikey met us at the top of the stairs, bouncing "Did I hear something about a turtle sleep over?"

"Mikey why are you even awake?" I rolled my eyes. "And why do you have so much energy? Its 4am for crying out loud!"

"I had to pee and on my way back I heard you mention a turtle sleepover! I get middle! Hehehe!" He bounded off into my room.

I looked at Leo and shrugged, "I guess we're stuck with him anyway."

"Yeah, " he snorted, then looked at me seriously, "but, Don, thanks… I needed that. I'll talk to him in the morning."

I waved my hand dismissively, "I'm not worried about it. Let me know if I can do anything"

The sound of Mikey jumping on my bed violently echoed out into the hallway. I groaned.

Leo chuckled, "Sounds like we'd better get in there before he breaks something."


	15. I Love You Too

**A/N: Well, by popular request this is a continuation of the last chapter I posted! :) Here is Leo and Raph's talk the next morning! Thank you so much for all the favs, follows, and reviews! Your feedback means the world to me; the other day I was feeling really crappy about my writing in general, and I went back through all my old reviews and it really made me feel better. :) You guys are awesome! Stay that way. - OMH**

**Disclaimer: I'm just a poor girl.. I own no turtles :(**

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"Well isn't this cute!"

Raph's sarcastic drawl cut through my dreams, waking me suddenly. I stretched and opening my eyes tentatively, I groaned. " Oh gross, Mikey! Get your nasty feet out of my face!"

Raph chuckled as I attempted to shove my little brother's offending appendages off of my plastron and rolled awkwardly onto my side. He was lounging in the doorway, observing the scene before him bemusedly.

I sighed, holding back a grin. "Are you going to help me or just stand there and laugh?"

He raised his eye ridges. "Well, if you're going to be like that, I'll just leave you where you are." He turned around, miming walking out of the room.

"No wait! Don't leave me!" I laughed.

I stretched out my hand; grasping it he pulled me from the tangled pile of Mikey and Don, who, as the heavy sleepers of the family, didn't even stir.

I grabbed my mask off of the bed post, tying it behind my head and slung my katanas onto my back. "Whew, thanks. I thought I was about to be crushed."

"No problem, bro. What kinda brotha' would I be to leave you with Mikey's smelly feet in ya face?" His amber eyes danced.

We made our way down to the kitchen, bantering lightly. He smelled lightly of alcohol and cigarettes, and I wrinkled my nose; he'd been drinking with Casey again. In the kitchen he downed a glass of water and began rummaging through the cabinets, and I plopped down at the table.

"You and Casey have fun last night?" I asked off handedly.

He poured himself a bowl of cereal and shrugged. "Yeah, it was cool."

"What'd you guys do?" I ventured tentatively, doing my best not to seem like I was about to lecture.

He stiffened. "We just hung around at his apartment."He answered suspiciously, a hard edge creeping into his voice. "Why?"

"I just was curious." I sighed; this was it. "Raph, can we talk?"

" 'Bout what?" He mumbled, annoyance evident in his tone, as he stuffed more cereal into his mouth.

I could feel his piercing amber gaze burning into me and I suddenly became fascinated with my hands, my concentration absorbed completely by the delicate ridges that crisscrossed my skin. I had no idea how to start, no clue how to convey everything I felt to my brother, who, even on a good day, was unlikely to believe me. He cleared his throat. My head snapped up, meeting his puzzled gaze with my own confusion.

"Uh, Leo?"

The words tumbled from my mouth disjointedly. "I know you feel like I don't care about you sometimes and that I hate you, but I want you to know that I don't. I mean I DO care and I DON'T hate you. I just want what's best for this family. But you're included! I just get so frustrated when you go topside because I'm so afraid of something going wrong and not being able to help you, and it's not that I don't trust you or think that you can handle yourself it's just… I love you, Raph and I don't want anything to happen!"

I grimaced as I finished my less than elegant speech and looked pleadingly up at Raph who had frozen, his spoon hovering in midair halfway between the bowl and his mouth. He blinked, slowly setting his spoon and bowl down on the counter. He said nothing, only blinking; I closed my eyes and waited. I waited for a response. I waited for him to explode, to scream, to yell, to curse. I expected him to tell me how stupid I was or how he didn't need my crap. I expected him to storm out, muttering about me being in his business. I expected pure unadulterated rage.

Opening my eyes, I found my hotheaded brother standing a hairsbreadth from me, chest heaving. I squared my shoulders, preparing to defend myself from furious blows. I flinched as he grabbed me, pulling me into a fierce bear hug. Stunned, I hesitated before lacing my hands behind him, embracing him back. We stood, interlocked for countless minutes before he dropped his arms, and began awkwardly trying to extract himself from me. I stepped back, looking up at my not so little brother. My steel blue eyes locked with his fiery gaze for a split second before he flew out of the kitchen, up the stairs, and into his room. And in that fraction of a moment I swear I saw moisture in those glowing golden orbs and the ghost of an "I love you, too" on his lips.


End file.
